By John Y. Brown III, on Tue Mar 18, 2014 at 12:00 PM ET
Whenever I hear someone say, “It is what it is,” I am going to respond, “That’s certainly true. But let’s not forget that it’s also not what it’s not.”
And then pause before adding, “Or is it? Know what I mean?” as I nod knowingly.
I think this will catch on and be the perfect confident rejoinder to the “Is = Is” breakthrough formulation devised just several years ago that no one is yet sure what exactly it means but we all sense it is something profoundly insightful that we can all agree on.
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A number of years ago a very wise friend of mine had this wry explanation about someone else we worked with who gave us fits but who somehow always seemed indispensable to management.
“His worth comes from being able to extricate our team out of crises that he manufactures.”
I laughed loud and hard at how right on the money my friend was with his observation.
And I swore I would never work again with anyone like the person he so fittingly described.
But sadly, I have discovered, there are more than just that one.
By John Y. Brown III, on Mon Mar 17, 2014 at 12:00 PM ET
A friend recommended I buy jeans at American Eagle Outfitters, a store I have never been to before.
I was excited until I was browsing and was told they not only didn’t have any jeans big enough for my waist (36), they also didn’t have any with a short enough inseam either (29).
And the worst part is I really liked the jeans!! I asked if they had a hybrid “Big and short section” for my size but they didn’t.
To add insult to injury, the waistlines for most jeans there are 26 and 28!!
What happened to us men the past 25 years? Or is this new fashion payback from women who men have idealized as far skinnier than normal for decades?
I smell gender payback all over this!
Come on, guys! I am on a diet…but for a normal male waistline circa 1985.
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It happens
When a guy reduces his waist from 38″ to a 35.5,” he can’t help but develop a little attitude.
And start asking himself if it is time to look into buying a pair of “skinny jeans.”
And feels a smug superiority toward men who sport a 36″ or 37″ inch waist.
By John Y. Brown III, on Fri Mar 14, 2014 at 12:00 PM ET
What? No upselling?
I just went through the drive-thru pharmacy at Walgreens to get a refill on an anti-cholesterol medication and was pleasantly surprised that I wasn’t asked if I would like to order “40 tablets instead of just 30?” and then asked if I would be interested in adding an “Anti-depressent or anti-anxiety medication today?” or if I would like to “Sign-up to win a year’s supply of a new mood stabilizer?” or being reminded that if I “Come back today after 2pm I can get a free refill on pain management meds purchased before 10am.”
Yet I also felt a little neglected.
Maybe the pharmacist just hadn’t completed “Customer service training” yet.
By John Y. Brown III, on Thu Mar 13, 2014 at 12:00 PM ET
Whenever I am driving our minivan and pass by a motorcycle gang I try to make eye contact as if to say to them, “Hey, I ‘get’ you guys. I was just listening the other day to Steppenwolf’s “Born to be Wild” and I really enjoyed the movie “Easy Rider.”
But the way they look back at me makes me wonder sometimes if they really understand what I am trying to communicate.
I guess sometimes that body language alone isn’t enough.
Or maybe they read my additional body language which says to them, “I’d probably join you guys except I am afraid of motorcycles” and then wondering to myself “If you ride a motorcycle for a long time in khakis, would it start to burn the inside of your legs?”
By John Y. Brown III, on Wed Mar 12, 2014 at 12:00 PM ET
I haven’t seen 12 Years a Slave yet but my favorite movie of 2013 was American Hustle.
The casting is flawless; the story is corrupt but uniquely American and irresistible (and less about the con game depicted than the co…n games each of us plays with ourseleves); the acting is mesmerizing; the mood, style, ennui and chutzpah of the period–the 70’s–is captured brilliantly; the writing, dialogue and camerawork make you feel like you are personally sitting in the background of each scene watching old friends; — and then there’s the soundtrack, a soundtrack tied to the core of the characters personalities and storyline as expressed in one of the early scenes as Irving, Christian Bale, realizes he’s falling in love with Sydney, Amy Adams.
“She was unlike anybody I ever knew.
She was smart. She saw through
people in situations. And she knew
how to live with passion and style.
She understood Duke Ellington.”
But my favorite song on the soundtrack isn’t from Duke Ellington but E.L.O.’s Overture which seems perfectly emblematic for this storyline and moment in time.
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Kentucky Hustle?
I watched American Hustle again last night and was amazed that a 22 year old (at the time) young lady from Louisville, KY dominated every scene she was in.
And she is in scenes with Bradley Cooper, Christian Bale, Amy Adams and many others.
Can we have a shout out for this KY star?
I love the scene when there is the big meeting with the mob bosses and everyone is intimidated by them except Jennifer Lawrence’s character, who sashays toward them and takes over their conversation in a matter of seconds.
That scene is emblematic of what she’s done with Hollywood, too.
By John Y. Brown III, on Tue Mar 11, 2014 at 12:00 PM ET
The “art” of every business deal comes down to the negotiation. Which can sometimes reach and stand-off and stare down.
The key then is to introduce some new leverage against the other party.
A recent personal experience shed light on a new negotiating tactic that had never occurrrd to me before.
Wait until the person you are negotiating with is trying to pa…ss a kidney stone and make your final offer along with promise of trying to help relieve the pain.
I know if someone had done this to me I would have signed anything put in front of me during that 2 day period if I thought it would help.
Me (without a kidney stone) can out-negotiate Donald Trump with a kidney stone.
By John Y. Brown III, on Mon Mar 10, 2014 at 12:00 PM ET
I switched and what the “switch” meant to me
After switching from a PC to a Macbook Pro, I have made other changes in my life
Instead of wearing a blue blazer and khaki pants, I put on a camel hair jacket and dress jeans.
I wear tasseled loafers instead of dockers
I use a larger screen Samsung Note phone instead a smaller screen iPhone
I drink lemonade instead of diet Coke–because I like lemonade better
I buy art that stands out rather than art that blends in
I say what I really believe more often instead of saying what I think the other person wants to hear.
I say no more often –instead of yes– when I mean no.
But switching to an Apple Macbook isn’t really about switching computers. It’s also not about making some hip lifestyle change. And isnt even about Apple –or having to use an Apple product.
It is instead about turning on the light switch in the dark room upstairs where you can be who you really are.
And being able to walk out of the room and mentally leave the light switched turned on.
By John Y. Brown III, on Fri Mar 7, 2014 at 12:00 PM ET
Click here to purchase his first book
Because my first book, Musings from the Middle, was such an unqualified non-disaster, I’ve decided to offer a follow-up book in late May titled–surprisingly–Musings from the Middle II (or possibly Musings from the Middle 2….or maybe just “More Musings from the Middle” or perhaps “A Tale of Two Cities,” unless that one is already taken)
Anyway, I hope sales break into the low three digits like my first book.
Which is the cool thing about being a self-published author. Even if other people aren’t really excited about you publishing a new book, you still can be. Like I am right now.
Here’s the opening Musing from Musings II:
“It was the best of times,
it was the worst of times,
it was the age of wisdom,
it was the age of foolishness,
it was the epoch of belief,
it was the epoch of incredulity,
it was the season of Light,
it was the season of Darkness,
it was the spring of hope,
it was the winter of despair
But mostly, it just is what it is”
OK. That’s not really one of my musings. I stole most of it and just added the last line myself and hoped no one would notice.
I checked to see if the title “A Tale of Two Cities” was still available, and of course with my luck, it’s not! But it turns out to have a pretty catchy beginning that I tried to crib but felt guilty about and am coming clean now.
But my new book will be all mine with lots of lines like the last one I added to A Tale of Two Cities introduction–that will reinforce this new book’s place among other self-published books that are deemed true non-disasters.
By John Y. Brown III, on Thu Mar 6, 2014 at 12:00 PM ET
Announcer’s voice:
“Is your real life making you depressed because your virtual life is so much more awesome–and only getting awesomer?
(Screen: Image of a “virtual life” making fun of an image of a despondent “actual life”)
Then you may want to consider asking your doctor about ProzacFB.
ProzacFB is a new drug that blocks the brain receptor identified by neurologists called 5HC2-FB (that creates pleasure from receiving “likes” on Facebook).
Once this pleasure receptor is blocked, patients will again be able to return to activities like reading books, exercise, manual hobbies, and interacting more frequently with live human beings.
It doesn’t mean that your virtual life will be ending…..only that your real life life won’t be so darned jealous of it.”
(Screen: Image of an “actual life” staring down image of a “virtual life”)
By John Y. Brown III, on Wed Mar 5, 2014 at 12:00 PM ET
“Look before you leap. But don’t stare.”
50 Years Ago Today (on March 4, 1964)…..a young restless attorney who didn’t have the passion for the law his father did and who was recently married with an infant son decided to throw caution to the wind—in large part because the more cautious road ahead held limited appeal to him–and to leave the practice of law to pursue the unlikely business proposition of selling a unique fried chicken recipe packaged in red and white buckets and promoted by a senior citizen in a white suit, string tie who sported a goatee and was named Colonel (he was commissioned a Kentucky Colonel years Harland Sanders.
Today 50 years ago was the day that my father (and his financial partner, Jack Massey from Tennessee) bought the rights to sell Colonel Sanders 11 secret herbs and spices and the day Kentucky Fried Chicken Corp was incorporated.
It was a very good day for my family, Kentucky, Colonel Sanders, people who like fried chicken and the practice of law.
It was a less momentous day for poultry everywhere.
Happy 50th Anniversary to a dreamer, my dad to dreamers everywhere for that matter), a man who dared to act on his unlikely dream. Until it wasn’t just a dream anymore.
“His worth comes from being able to extricate our team out of crises that he manufactures.”
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