By John Y. Brown III, on Thu Jul 17, 2014 at 12:00 PM ET  Has this ever happened to you?
“Unbelievable!” is all you can say.
You walk out of a coffee shop back to your car and notice a new and severe crack down the rear right side that wasn’t there when you parked. You utter in frustration, “Oh… man! How did this happen?” startling a women walking in with heels so high the break in concentration almost causes here to fall.
Not wanting to cause any injuries you stop talking out loud to yourself as your mind starts racing about how much this is going to cost you to fix and how unfair it is since you just got your car fixed less than a month ago for something else that wasn’t your fault (even though it really was your fault).
 And then you realize your car is actually in the space behind the car you are fixated on and is just as you left it 20 minutes earlier.
And you pull out feeling the universe is, after all, a pretty fair place. And like you got your first good break of the day already and it’s not even 730am.
By Lauren Mayer, on Wed Jul 16, 2014 at 8:30 AM ET
Politics and pop culture have always been strange allies, from campaign songs (“Tippecanoe & Tyler Too,” William Henry Harrison’s 1840 theme) to actors-turned-politicians (Arnold Schwarzenegger, Ronald Reagan, and I hope someone reading this knows who George Murphy is – I am NOT that old but I am a buff of old movie musicals and learned about him through a Tom Lehrer song . . . but I digress). Presidents have even joined in the fun, including Clinton’s famous sax solo on Arsenio Hall and Obama’s appearance on “Between The Ferns,” although nothing can top Richard Nixon uncomfortably saying “Sock it to me?” on Laugh-In. (And yes, I AM that old . . . )
However, this alliance can sometimes be not only awkward but cause friction when politicians use songs without permission – Jackson Browne successfully sued McCain for using his “Running On Empty” to attack Obama in ads, and Ann & Nancy Wilson formally complained when Sarah Palin used “Barracuda” as her theme song. Those objections are understandable, since repeated use of a song implies the artist endorses that candidate. On the other hand, I sympathize with conservatives who have a much harder time finding good anthems by rock stars who support them – not much to choose from besides Lee Greenwood’s “God Bless America,” which might explain Ted Nugent’s recent resurgence . . .
The other time rock & politics make uncomfortable bedfellows is when pundits jump into the fray, like Bill O’Reilly’s near-obsessive complaints about Beyoncé being a bad role model – although as Jon Stewart pointed out, the video he was most upset about involved sex with her husband in an expensive limousine, so O’Reilly should have been thrilled that she was glorifying both marital passion and conspicuous capitalism. Unfortunately, other Fox news hosts must have missed Stewart’s ridicule of what he termed O’Reilly’s ‘disapproval boners,’ because last week Jesse Watters claimed that Democrats like Hillary Clinton relied on “Beyonce voters,” single women who “depend on government because they’re not depending on their husbands. They need things like contraception, health care, and they love to talk about equal pay.” This foot-in-mouth moment inspired endless internet analysis, a wildly popular Tumblr account, and at least one suburban mom to squeeze into a leotard and take advantage of a rock/political moment too tempting to resist:
By John Y. Brown III, on Tue Jul 15, 2014 at 12:00 PM ET  Young people –especially young men in their 20s, 30s and even 40s– like to think they know it all.And it is embarrassing but critical as they get older to re-evaluate and correct long-held but wrong assumptions.
For example, in your 50s you start to realize that the blow dryer on the wall in men’s restrooms that you have been using to dry your hands for decades is actually for drying your pants.
Or maybe it is just practical creativity and innovation that comes with age.
By John Y. Brown III, on Mon Jul 14, 2014 at 12:00 PM ET Guess what?
If you are simple and from the South one day you will grow up. Maybe you are 51, like me, when it happens. Maybe younger; maybe older.
But one day you come to realize that life really isn’t like a box chocolates.
It’s a painful realization at first. But you will just have to deal with it.
Even Forrest Gump, at age 51, would probably say life is really more like eating a piece of Peanut Brittle with sensitive teeth.
Don’t get me wrong. Life is still good. But we have to learn, even here in the South, life is more complicated than we thought—and that we can’t chew if we want to enjoy life and have it last a long time. Especially with sensitive teeth.
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Thought for the day
Today I will go slower to go farther.
And if I get too far ahead of myself, I will speed up.
By John Y. Brown III, on Thu Jul 10, 2014 at 12:00 PM ET Ignorance isn’t bliss. Or else almost everybody would be blissful –instead of straining to pretend we are knowledgeable.
Maybe that is an overstatement but the prevalence of my own ignorance astounds me sometimes.
Today I listened to a gentleman point out how many times a particular word shows up in a particular book. The idea was that the word –a concept really–was important because it is used so often by the author.
That got me to thinking. “OK then. What word is used more than any other in the book? That word must be the most important word of all, right? I figured it is probably the word ‘the.’ That doesn’t mean ‘the’ is the most important word or “message.” It is just ironic given the point my friend was making –and I (silently) was being a smart aleck.
But then I tried to define “the” to myself. “Well,” I thought, “it’s an article…and means…um…um….well what it means is….it is….means…..geez…I got nothing.”
That’s right. In addition to “the” perhaps being the most common word in most any book, “the” is the word –of the thousands of words I utter each day–the word I use most of all!!
And I have no idea beyond a finessed fake answer what the dickens “the” means or how to define it. My most used word in the English language.
So I looked it up. And here is the definition.
“The (used, especially before a noun, with a specifying or particularizing effect, as opposed to the indefinite or generalizing force of the indefinite article a or an):the book you gave me; (Come into the house)”
And I was reminded why I am not able to define “the” –and probably never will be able to.
But I am gonna keep using the heck out of the word “the” anyway!
The end. (Whatever that means.)
By Jonathan Miller, on Wed Jul 9, 2014 at 12:00 PM ET  Twice in two days I have seen these new miniature cars.
They make me nervous but I wasn’t sure why.
 But I think I just figured out why.
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Some days…like today…you will be feeling the perfect combination of older, calmer, more experienced and confident…and at the perfectly timed moment in a conversation you will open your mouth to dispense, finally, what everyone else will instantly realize is indisputably as wise as it is correct…and just as everyone is looking at you in anticipation…you will draw a complete blank.
And you never saw it coming.
And fortunately, graciously, you will forget most of that horrifying experience in about an hour-and-a-half.
By John Y. Brown III, on Tue Jul 8, 2014 at 12:00 PM ET  Whoa, Dude!
John’s excellent adventure–at least according to Facebook
Last night I was in Lexington and did login to Facebook account with a new replacement phone.
But this morning when I woke up and read the notice, it says I was in Atlanta, GA!
I have no recollection of driving to Atlanta last night to log into Facebook but apparently, according to Facebook, I did. I do remember the drive back to Louisville seemed a little longer than usual.
All I know is I woke up this morning with a hazy memory of last night. I just hope it was awesome.
By John Y. Brown III, on Sun Jul 6, 2014 at 12:00 PM ET  Sunday morning.
Eight thirty in the A.M.
A blonde dame, my wife Rebecca, was in the other room.
She was trouble but knew what she wanted –even if she didn’t know why. I was attracted to trouble, especially trouble named Rebecca. I didn’t know what I wanted—but at least I knew why (thanks to a good therapist who cost me some serious cabbage).
We each had a cup of Joe –mine with sugar and cream; hers with Splenda and skim milk.
Like I said, it was Sunday.
And Sundays can be boring.
So I tried to fancy it up with film noir dialogue. Dialogue that was edgy hut as plain and as cheap as a two day old vanilla scone from a coffee shop you’ve never heard of –and will never go back to (after eating the two day old vanilla scone).
I didn’t create this problem of facing long Sundays with no plans. But I was going to have to solve it.
It’s what I do.
I don’t know why it’s what I do. But I do know why I don’t know why. (See above about having a good therapist.)
It wasn’t the beginning of a beautiful friendship. It was the middle of a beautiful marriage. That line may not be as catchy as the one from Casablanca, but it’s more than Bogie and Ingrid Bergman ever had. And it’s in color, see?
Maybe the middle of beautiful marriages isn’t supposed to make you think of film noir—of dark alleyways, danger and surprise lurking, guns with fingers twitching and bad dialogue around ever corner. I guess they are more like a relaxing Sunday morning. But still with a cup of Joe. And preferably fresh scones, from the coffee shop you know always go to.
By John Y. Brown III, on Sat Jul 5, 2014 at 12:00 PM ET On Saturday mornings I attend a meditation group….and have for several years.
I try not to get competitive but this morning I am really feeling it…and am gonna out meditate everyone in the room.
I may even trash talk a little.
“Don’t bring that weak meditation posture in here, yo!!” Or when the timer goes off ending the session shout, “Bam! That’s what I’m talking about!!”
By John Y. Brown III, on Thu Jul 3, 2014 at 12:00 PM ET My ingenious solution to compromise when two strong-willed individuals are trying to fairly resolve a disagreement:
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The Recovering Politician Bookstore
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Has this ever happened to you?
