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The Politics of Laughter 6 Life Lessons [The Walrus and The Oyster] No thanks… [picture] That is one crafty physics professor. [picture] Sometimes you just have to play a little air guitar. Our RP’s will know what I’m talking about! [.gif] Are you supposed to be writing a research paper right now? [picture] The race is officially on. Less than 26 years before the filing deadline, we now have two slates running for Governor in 2037. You may have caught the RP’s announcement earlier today that he was running with 17-year-old John Y. Brown, IV as his running mate. Now read contributing RP John Y. Brown, III‘s statement in response:
Thoughts? Do you have a favorite ticket? Other ideas for candidates? Did you read Brown’s column about political addiction yesterday and are jonesing to jump in the race yourself? Please use the comment section below to make any statements, announcements, etc.: This past weekend, the RP showed up as a guest on “Kentucky Newsmakers,” the long running talk show hosted by living legend Bill Bryant. The RP waxed nostalgically about his career in politics and shared his vision for The Recovering Politician. Inadvertently, he also made some news when Bryant asked him about his political future: The RP announced his bid for Governor in 2037, with running mate, John Y. Brown, IV, the 17-year-old son of contributing RP John Y. Brown, III. Watch the interview below (The RP’s stunning announcement comes about 12 minutes in): While Bryant accurately noted in the interview that 2037 is not an election year, the RP neglected to respond that his ticket’s top policy goal is to amend the state constituion to hold a gubernatorial election in 2037. Platform position #2 is to bring back the electric chair…for politicians who use online petitions. Plank 3, devised by Lt. Governor candidate Brown, is to implement voluntary furloughs, up to 30 days, for high school students: Brown explained, “In these tough economic times, it is important for all of us to share some of the sacrifice.” Stay tuned to RPTV for all of the latest news on the 2037 campaign… While the Internet has provided some extraordinary new vehicles for the modern campaign to share its message, a particularly abhorrent one has emerged over the past several months: The Online Petition. In what appears to be a nakedly transparent method to collect email addresses and/or to raise small-dollar campaign contributions, our email boxes have been filled since the last election cycle with hundreds of banal, completely ineffective, poorly-considered online petitions seeking our virtual signature. I was recently solicited (by a politician/friend, mind you) to “sign” a petition in support of a college basketball team’s efforts to win a ball game. They lost, natch. So, I am taking the next logical step, and exercising my First Amendment rights — by distributing a online petition, urging politicians to cease and desist in this odious online petition practice. I urge you — no I beg you, to sign my online petition at: http://www.petitionspot.com/petitions/TheRP The language is below:
Please, for the love of our country, sign the online petition at http://www.petitionspot.com/petitions/TheRP
It’s an “Aha” moment for the audience that what primarily drives some of our political candidates may not be the privilege of toiling over mundane public policy day in and day out, but rather to “win” some kind of overdramatized contest and the sense of accomplishment that comes with it. (Think of the hit TV series the Apprentice that follows job applicants for months going through a variety of ordeals until one is finally told by Donald Trump, “You’re hired.” We never find out—or care, for that matter—how the winner actually performs on the job.) Political candidates often get similar treatment from voters and the media. We treat business and politics as part sport and part theater. But The Recovering Politician asks a slightly different and more personally poignant question: When one’s political yearnings have been squelched, dashed, sated, or otherwise drummed out of him or her, doesn’t every ex-politician go into that same small room ––this time alone—and ask, “Now what do I do?” The answer, of course, is yes —and the choices ex-politicos make to create meaning in their lives post-politics is more interesting and hopeful than one might think. The Recovering Politician blog explores this area in hopes of humoring and humanizing the reader—and the subjects. Four days before the 1988 presidential general election, featuring a matchup between then-Vice President George H.W. Bush and Massachusetts Governor Mike Dukakis, I was asked to appear on the cable television program that helped usher in the age of political broadcast incivility: CNN’s Crossfire. At the ripe age of 21, I was serving as Executive Director of College Democrats of America, and I was poised to debate my counterpart at College Republicans, as well as the ultra-formidable Pat Buchanan. I really didn’t know the Duke’s policy positions that intimately — I had worked for Al Gore in the primaries — so I pulled an all-nighter reading white papers. In addition to being exhausted, I was sick to my stomach: extremely nervous because I WAS GOING ON FRICKIN’ NATIONAL TV TO DEBATE PAT BUCHANAN!!! So, green in more ways that one, equipped with an all-purpose Watergate one-liner to parry Pat, and sporting my regrettable 80’s era hairdo (Does Justin Bieber owe me a commission?), I had my 10 minutes in the bright lights. Enjoy: As Charlie Sheen might have said, “music is the gin and tonic of the soul.” Of course, there’s no denying the redemptive impact of song. Whether to soothe, pacify, or even offer catharsis, we’ve all turned to music during times of recovery — from an illness, a professional setback, or, quite often, a breakup. Last week, I ended an 11 1/2 year relationship…with state government. Neil Sedaka was accurate when he crooned that “Breaking Up is Hard to Do,” but the dissolution of any relationship is much too complex to be captured by 60s-era bubblegum pop. For my own personal recovery process, I have loaded my trusty iPad with some of my favorite healing music. And in the spirit of Nick Hornby’s “High Fidelity” (read the book; it’s much better than the movie), I share below My Top Five Breakup Songs: (Click on the album covers to sample and/or download to your MP3 player) 5. Adele, “Rolling in the Deep” My daughters introduced me to the sulky smooth, blues-laden stylings of the unbelievably young (she just turned 22?!?) Adele. Her newest masterpiece drew my attention to an early stage of my recovery from politics: denial, tinged with exasperated anger: “We could have had it all/Rolling in the deep/You had my heart inside of your hands/And you played it to the beat.” Dreams of higher office squelched by the vagaries of politics — it certainly bears some resemblance to the unexpected implosion of a relationship with that “perfect” soulmate. “We could have had it all,” voters! But alas… 4. Bonnie Raitt, “I Can’t Make You Love Me”
While Raitt had already secured her place in rock history by helping to discover Bruce Springsteen, this classic resolutely establishes her as the bard of melancholy self-pity. With a haunting melody and a voice that aches with trenchant agony, Raitt sets the perfect mood for an evening of painful introspection: “Turn down the lights/Turn down the bed/Turn down these voices inside my head.” Instead of those blaring, patriotic anthems that accompany a losing candidate’s walk to the concession podium, this ballad should be required listening for Election Night audiences: I worked my heart out to win your support, then you broke it into pieces. Dear voters, why can’t I make you love me?
 #3: "You Oughta Know" by Alanis Morissette 3. Alanis Morissette, “You Oughta Know”
Of course, self-pity soon can metastasize into vengeful anger, and there’s no better theme song for the dumped than Morissette’s breakout hit, the song that established a whole new genre of “tough chick rock” (See Pink, Avil Lavigne, etc.) Alanis’ scorned lover caustically captures the false promises of lust disguised as love–or in the case of a recovering politician, the fickleness of the body politic: “And every time you speak her name/Does she know how you told me you’d hold me/Until you died, till you died?/But you’re still alive.” (And isn’t it ironic that in each primary that I’ve lost, the voters chose “an older version of me”? Hmmmmm…)
 #2: "Romeo and Juliet" by Dire Straits 2. “Romeo and Juliet” by Dire Straits: A truly transcendent song, on one of rock’s most underappreciated albums. With a nod to both Shakespeare and Leonard Bernstein’s stage and screen adaptation, Mark Knopfler sets the romantic legend in the late 70s and reveals the core of its message; one that can reassure a jilted lover (or politician) that the failure wasn’t your fault — as fate or the Good Lord would have it, it just wasn’t your time: “There’s a place for us/You know the movie song/When you gonna realize, it was just that the time was wrong?” Hey, there’s more fish in the sea/elections to win! (Oh, and Taylor Swift: I love your music, but when you were on the road with your English tutor, did y’all skip the last act of Shakespeare’s play? Romeo and Juliet didn’t exactly have a happy ending.)  #1: "I Will Survive" by Gloria Gaynor 1. Gloria Gaynor, “I Will Survive” OK, disco haters; go ahead and scoff. But Gaynor’s anthem for the final stage of breakup recovery — acceptance and transcendence — is the ideal background music for a recovering politician who’s realized that there’s more to life than temporal adulation and ephemeral power. And when that political fever threatens to re-infect you, Miss Gloria reminds you to reject the sweet succor of narcissism, empowering you with her personal mantra: “And you see me/somebody new/I’m not that chained up little person still in love with you/And so you felt like dropping in and just expect me to be free/Now I’m saving all my loving for someone who’se loving me…” OK, that’s five for fighting about. What am I missing? What have I misunderstood? How will my life go on? (Speaking of…For goodness’ sake, NO CELINE DION!!) Please leave below your comments, critiques, and most importantly, lists of your top five breakup songs: The Politics of Laughter Good news, everyone! Laughing is good for your heart! Enjoy the rest of these web gems! [Bloomberg] Natalie Portman has recently done some serious dramatic roles (Black Swan). However she still enjoys being in a comedy from time to time. [Hindustan Times] Arnold Schwarzenegger is said to be planning a new movie called The Governator. Revolving around a character based on his role as governor of the state of California. The character is also planned to be used in a comic series, a T.V. show, and games. [The Holywood Reporter] Okay, so if you didn’t get to pull an April Fool’s Day prank, you have missed your chance (until next year). However, this would still be a fantastic prank for anyone who works in an office. [picture] In just a few days, a new entry to the blogosphere will revolutionize the way Americans think about politics. All right…I doth promote too much. I am a recovering politician after all. I can promise, however, that The Recovering Politician will present a unique forum for spirited, reasoned, civil dialogue — dispatches from a few dozen folks who’ve actually served in the arena; and now having left, are liberated to share their experiences and critiques of the system without partisan bias or interest group pressures. Don’t expect interminable political blather; our contributors will also share their opinions and ideas about business, religion, sports, pop culture, you name it. And you’ll be encouraged to join the conversation through your comments. Be prepared to join us on April 1. In the meantime, feel free to surf around the bare bones of the site: check out our mission, sign up for my email notification list, and join me on the social networks: Facebook, Twitter, etc — you can find the links and forms above. So strap in tight, liftoff is in T minus 12,000, 11,999, 11,998… Best, Jonathan Miller, The Recovering Politician |
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