John Y’s Musings from the Middle: The Divider

The little recognized “divider”

In the early stages of life we find qualities serve us that seem at the time “most important” to success. The more obvious ones are intelligence, hard work, education, looks, personality, persistence, loyalty, faith, honor, savvy and the like.

All those seem to come and go after being indispensable at some point during our early life stages. But what about the key trait that distinguishes those who thrive in the middle years and those who find this period befuddling and daunting?

I think the key distinguishing trait is self-awareness—or more bluntly, self-honesty. How well are we able to candidly and painfully assess who we are and how we see the world and our place in it. Maybe this is what Socrates meant with his maxim, “Know thyself.”

I was having lunch with very bright friend 4 years ago who as a few years younger than I. He has a law degree from Harvard and was wondering how to figure out succeeding in the murky middle years. I remember saying something like, “I think it is less taxing on our minds than our souls. And open to all who are ready for the journey within where we get to meet and make peace with ourselves.” Adding, “it’s the easiest on the surface but the hardest in practice.”

And I don’t think I’ve wavered from that belief in the 4 years since then.