John Y’s Musings from the Middle: If life could only be like this….

A Public Service Request: Ok, everybody. A few simple requests. Lately, traffic has been really irritating me.

I am in a silver Avalon with Jefferson Co plates. If you see me out driving and I am trying to switch lanes, please just let me in. I am in a hurry and am going to assume you aren’t. If I am behind you and seem to be tailgating you, it isn’t a coincidence. I really need you to speed it up or get in the slow lane. OK?

Also, some people who don’t absolutely have to be out driving today, I would really appreciate it if you could stay in and not congest traffic around me—at least between now and 9am and again between 530-630pm and, finally, between 1230-130pm in just the Louisville Metro area. If you live outside of this area, I don’t mind you driving today. But need you to be sure to avoid Metro Louisville.

And please no honking or waving gestures or shaking your head at me if I do something driving that you disapprove of. That hurts my feelings. Especially no honking when a light has turned green and I haven’t accelerated for several seconds. This is just my way of getting back into “driving mode” after stopping.

Oh, and if you are tailgating me, be ready to slam on your brakes at a moment’s notice. I know you want me to speed up, but that’s not going to happen –especially now that you are tailgating me. And please know that even though I may not give you the finger, I am still thinking it.

Feel free to wave hello or smile when passing. Or just give me a nice thumbs up. Then I am going to need you to stop distracting me.

Sound reasonable?

Thanks very much in advance! I think this will really help my frame of mind today.

Have a great day!