John Y’s Musings From the Middle: How Social Media Could Save Your Life

How social media could save your life.

(A hypothetical situation)

If you are one of those people who believe Klout is just another vanity website and waste of time like Facebook and Twitter, think again.

And please listen to how I had to learn the hard way the true value of these websites.

One night last week I was walking alone through a dark isolated parking lot worrying I could get mugged. I clenched my fists as my fight-flight syndrome kicked in.

My pulse spiked, pupils dilated and my mind raced thinking of potential weapons I could use. I first thought of my car keys…and then, in a flash of brilliance, I had my answer, if mugged, I would immediately shout out to my assailant:

“You picked the wrong guy, pal! You will really want to rethink mugging me after hearing what I have to tell you. I have a high Klout score. That’s right. Do you know what that means? Probably not. So let me tell you. Klout is a metric that measures Facebook and Twitter usage. That means I know a lot of people on Facebook and I Tweet quite frequently. Yes, Tweet! That means I will tell on you and you will get caught through modern social media tools. And if that isn’t enough to make you quake in your boots, I’m also pretty active on LinkenIn.”

At this point I plan to eerily and ominously glare at my assailant, eyes squinted, and make the sounds “Tweet. Tweet. Tweet.” (Like the guy in the movie Warriors when he says “Warriors, come out and plaaaayyyy”)

And then I am going to add, “And by the way, my female colleague is leaving the office right after me. And btw she has a pretty low Klout score.” And then raise my eyebrow as if to say, “That’s something for you to think about.”

In my scenario, my assailant lets me go and waits for my colleague.

And Klout, Facebook and Twitter, helped save me from getting mugged. At least in this made-up hypothetical situation that ends happily ever after for everyone. Except my female colleague who I spend the next year making this up to.

Maybe now you’ll think twice before you criticize these websites again….Word.