BREAKING: John Y. Brown, III Tries Out for “American Idol”

(ORLANDO) Yesterday, my daughter tried out and made the first round of auditions for American Idol at Disney. And decided to stop before continuing. But not before making me promise to audition today–with her joining me at the audition.

Maggie and I went in a small room with a really friendlye auditioner who asked us a lot of very friendly questions.

I was a liltte nervous and explained I was Oliver in the play named, well, Oliver, at camp when I was 12 and choked when signing “Where is Love,” and that  today–37 years later–was my chance to vindicate myself. The auditioner lady, Katie, told me to stand on the star and sing for 30 seconds acapello.

My daughter nudged me toward the star. I cleared my throat and bagan. My voice quivered at first, but I immediately broke out and was nailing the song –just like I did practicing it at age 12. But the finale approached and I swung for the fences but missed the final note. I didn’t think I missed it too badly and  hoped that the auditioner didn’t notice. Even though my daughter was laughing uncontrollably just a few feet away.

Katie complemented me and my musical ear and asked if I played any instruments. I answered her, but mostly just wanted to know if I had made it to the second round.

I explained that my daughter –the one laughing really hard–made it to the second round yesterday. Hinting that we had the same genes, so, you know….that should count for something.

And I mentioned again that I’d been waiting for 37 years to make this right.

A pic of me at Disney today. Hanging my head in shame after failing to make it past the first audition at American Idol.

Katie asked me my name and began writing. I was hopeful.

It was a Disney button with my name on it. A consolation prize for not making the second round. The equivalent of a giant loser button you can wear for the rest of the rrip so people will know you didn’t make it past the first round at the American Idol audition.

As she handed it to me I imagined Chuck Berry gonging  me from the old Gong Show and saying someting insulting.

I took the button and threw it away as soon as I was outside– as I munbled “Bitch” under my breath 15 minutes later my daughter is still laughing.

It was a magical experience, still. Becuase I learned that when I choked at age 12 and refused to sing “Where is Love” solo in the play Oliver, I made the right decision. Today vindicated me.